Chapter 20 > The transformed believer
“People always attribute who they are to circumstances. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get ahead in life are the people who actively seek the circumstances they want, and if they don’t find them, they create them.” [1]
The Muslim who has had enough of primitive group processes and enemy thinking creates space for personal development.
When a Muslim leaves behind the psychologically damaging elements of Islam and retains only what strengthens his mental health, autonomy, and humanity, the result is usually not a “half-belief” but a transformed attitude toward life.
Life shifts from loyalty and submission to inner freedom and integration.
Below, I outline what such a life often looks like in practice, along psychological and existential lines.
From fear regulation to inner peace
In many traditional forms of Islam, fear plays a central regulatory role:
fear of “wrong” thoughts
fear of breaking rules
fear of hell and punishment
fear of social exclusion
fear of the “hostile” outside world
When this layer is released, a chronic state of guilt and hypervigilance disappears. It is replaced by:
more inner peace
less compulsive self-monitoring
a decrease in feelings of guilt and shame
The person learns that moral behavior does not stem from threat, but from inner conviction and empathy.
God shifts from controller to existential foundation
Psychologically speaking, the image of God changes fundamentally.
Left behind is:
God as an all-seeing controller
God as punitive authority
God as an extension of social pressure
What remains:
God as a symbol of order, meaning, or transcendence
God as an inner reference point for values
or even: God as an open question, not as a definitive answer
This is mentally healthy because the external superego (the strict divine Father who is constantly watching) is exchanged for a personal conscience.
Rituals become a choice, not a compulsion
Prayer, fasting, or charity lose their compulsive nature.
They become:
spontaneous
moments of reflection
cultural or emotional anchors
voluntary practices with a self-regulating function
When a ritual becomes empty, people abandon it — without existential fear. That is psychologically mature religiosity.
Identity becomes plural and non-defensive
The person is no longer primarily “Muslim,” but rather:
human
parent, friend, professional
citizen
an individual with a unique life history
This reduces:
us/them thinking
vulnerability
aggressive identity protection
Religion becomes an aspect of identity, not a totalizing framework.
Sexuality and emotions are integrated
Once dogmatic control over sexuality and emotions disappears:
inner division diminishes
secrecy and shame disappear
space is created for intimacy, pleasure, and self-acceptance
Emotions are no longer suspicious, but informative. Sexuality is not a moral minefield, but part of being human.
Moral action becomes relational rather than legal
Good and evil are no longer measured by:
literal rules
ancient texts
authorities
But by:
empathy
context
responsibility
This leads to moral maturity rather than obedience.
Freedom without emptiness
Important: this transition rarely leads to nihilism.
On the contrary:
meaning shifts from imposed → learned
values are chosen → not inherited
responsibility is borne → not outsourced
The person does not live “against” Islam, but after Islam.
Psychological end result
Psychologically, we often see:
more self-confidence
fewer anxiety disorders
fewer depressive guilt patterns
more joy in life
greater tolerance towards others
People become unique individuals, not nameless objects of a system.
“If you concentrate on what your inner personality wants and says, the suffering will be over.” [2]
In conclusion
The life of such a Muslim ultimately resembles that of an autonomous, ethically, and spiritually mature person:
rooted in compassion
free from coercion
responsible without fear
spiritual without dogma